What are thinking traps?

Psychologist Thomas F. Cash, a pioneer in body-image research, described how much of our distress about appearance comes from “faulty cognitive distortions” or thinking traps rooted in how we interpret and talk to ourselves about our bodies.

These thinking traps aren’t just “negative thoughts,” they are patterns of thinking that become automatic and deeply embedded. Cash’s work shows that they play a big role in how people cope with appearance-related stress.

An Example Trap: Beauty-Bound

A powerful example is Beauty Bound. This is the belief that your appearance limits what you can do or how you can behave. For a teen, that might sound like:

• “I can’t go to the pool until I lose weight.”

• “I'm too fat to wear a tank top.”

• “If people see my arms, they’ll laugh.”

This thinking trap can be deeply restrictive, holding your teen back from socializing, self-expression, or simply enjoying normal teenage life.

Spotting the Signs in Your Teen

As a parent, you might notice some red flags that suggest your teen is wrestling with body-image thinking traps:

• Clothing choices: Wearing long sleeves or jackets when it's hot outside, or consistently choosing very baggy clothes to hide their body.

• Avoidance behavior: Declining social activities (“I don’t want to go out — I feel too fat”), or not wearing certain clothes because of self-consciousness.

• Mealtime challenges: Increased tension or anxiety around eating. Comments like “I don’t deserve this,” skipping food, or overthinking portions can hint at body image distress.

• Self-talk: If you overhear self-critical statements about their body, or notice them resisting photos, mirrors, or other triggers.

These behaviors don’t always mean there's a serious problem, but they’re worth noticing — and gently opening a conversation around.

What Parents Can Do: Three Gentle Steps

1. Start with Validation
Acknowledge your teen’s feelings without trying to correct or minimize them. Statements like, “That sounds really hard,” or “I can understand why you’d feel that way,” help your teen feel heard and safe enough to open up.

2. Introduce the Idea of Thinking Traps
Gently explain that sometimes our minds fall into “appearance thinking traps” that distort how we see ourselves — like believing we can’t do something because of how we look (Beauty Bound). Stay curious, not corrective: “I wonder if that might be a thinking trap getting in your way.”

3. Seek Professional Support When Needed
If you notice that concerns about appearance are starting to affect your teen’s social life, eating patterns, daily functioning, or willingness to participate in activities, it may be helpful to reach out to a mental health professional who works with adolescents. Support from a psychologist can help your teen understand their thinking patterns, build coping strategies, and regain confidence in how they move through the world.